Last

(Wakes up all alone one morning, maybe at a beach house in the summer.)

I dreamed I was a spear hunter in a forest of oaks. A fawn, separated from its doe, was shaking in the brush. It was too scared to run.

I cut, spilling out its insides, and then it looked past, behind me, as if for the moment something was more pressing. I followed its gaze and turned around.

I was the deer, and I was me. What was it that we saw together? What remains in all these living and dying forms? But I saw nothing but colors.

Then, I saw myself in a mirror, putting on a black tie. Was I getting ready for something important? Was it a funeral? Wedding? A birthday face?

Peaches, wampyr

dream

June 2, 2004. 6am
vampire party
taking the long mine shaft elevator down to meet my anti-self in my parents' crypt.
fish soup, peach cobbler.
undead were happy to see me; their house was in the Waterworks Cemetery, somewhere in New England.
went to visit after being stabbed with two swords in the heart.
Some fight.
chicken and couscous too.
Fake motherfuckers.

Moral: I need to cook more, eat out less.

New Disease

A night, I dreamed of a sickness, Rash.

How little I know about chemistry, and I mean people chemistry, like you and me.

All I know of Rash is that people want it.

It gives people big red maps, bodywide, except for the face.

But it feels so good.

The medicine fixes your problem, but burns out the pleasure, for the rest of the life.

Painful solution. (Isn't solution a funny word? It's a liquid and a cure?)

Left with a choice.

Is that what my dreams are? Anxieties of choice?